Thursday, March 3, 2016

Shut up and Think with Me


You waltz into a session and a student has an essay. You read it out loud, fix a couple of grammar mistakes, and you’re good. Until you and the tutee stumble on a paragraph that needs to be changed or rewritten. You start asking a couple of open ended questions and the tutee is inspired. He picks up his pen and begins writing with zeal, until you start yapping with your big ol’ mouth.

Your intent is good; you’re just trying to give the tutee some ideas. But from the perspective of a tutee, please shut up. The tutee has a train of thought and is getting somewhere, until he gets distracted by your words.


I promise you, at appropriate times, silence isn’t awkward. You may feel the need to fill the quietness; just let it be. And you know, silence is golden, but duct tape is silver :)


I’ve experienced this a couple of times with tutoring creative writing. I was having my creative writing piece tutored and I decided I wanted to add a couple of new lines to my poem. My tutor asked some great open-ended questions and I got where I was going.  But my tutor saw that I was quiet and asked some more questions; she didn’t realize that I was thinking and that her questions were distracting me. I needed some quiet time to develop my ideas.


In a tutoring session where a tutee is coming up with ideas, try to give the tutee some space. And hey, if you can’t keep the silence, leave: I am serious. Let us say the tutee needs to rewrite a paragraph, tell the tutee you’re going to get some water or you’re going to the bathroom (lying is okay for the sake of education). Or maybe you can stay by the tutee and do your own thing so that you’re at the tutee’s disposal.

You might call this lazy, but I’m going to be generous and call it a minimalist tutoring ideology.
I think tutors are available to guide tutees in the right direction and  as soon as you guide them, let ‘em go. Our purpose as tutors is to create better writers; you are giving tutees a chance to practice their skills when you give them some space.


Some tutors, who teach by the book, feel that they are not doing their job if they’re not constantly asking questions. Open ended questions are good to get ideas going, but as soon as an idea develops, you can stop. You also have to remember that tutees can’t answer your questions on demand. They need time to think and then when they are ready, they’ll answer. Bombarding them with questions isn’t going to help them answer the first question you asked; it’s just distracting.


I’ve found that this method works for me and my tutees, but of course, like any strategy, tutors may like it or hate it. You just have to find what is most beneficial to you and the students you are helping.


Do you agree with the method? What strategies do you use? Let me know in the comments below or email me!

Oh and here’s a cool blog from Saint Mary’s University that also talks about how silence can be used as a tool.

7 comments:

  1. This is so funny, and I really like your method! I have a problem with asking a lot of questions instead of allowing the tutee to work on it on their own, so this is really helpful.

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  3. The take you took on this was so great, I'm sure we've all had times when we rambled on as tutors...I know I did. And your humor is the best as always.

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  4. I'm really glad I read this! I've noticed recently that I tend to ask more questions when they're silent for too long. I guess I just needed someone to tell me to shut up:)

    -Lexi

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  5. I like your sass throughout the blog. Also, you brought up a really great and unique point that a lot of us often forget. Great job sass master!

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  6. Great tips, Aya! And sassy as always :)

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